Have you ever wanted something so much, that you are scared to think about it? That’s how I feel right now. Tomorrow afternoon, I have an interview for a position that I applied for. And even though its only for 2 months, I really want to get it. But I am scared of wanting it. […]
Read MoreI’m taking my graduation photos this afternoon. Its 10:30 right now and I am ball of anxiety. And its such a weird feeling for me because I haven’t felt that in a while. Some part of me hates myself that I can’t do something normal and something that I have been looking forward to. The […]
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For an entire week, I prayed and hoped and wished, every single day that he would survive. Every single time that I received a message or a call, I was afraid for it to be those words. The confirmation that I didn’t want. I was about to fall asleep when my phone rang. It was […]
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Its been about a month since I last cried. Until tonight when I reflected about how I’ve been feeling in my journal. Lately, I’ve become distant and pretending that everything’s okay when its not. I’ve been sleeping my days away, watching The Good Doctor , reading and staring at the wall. The Good Doctor is […]
Read MoreI really try to be grateful and not complain but I need to. All today I have been saying confidently that I am not submitting my assignment tonight. That I am going to submit it later. But the thing is, its not that I am proud of that. Its that I am trying to convince […]
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I’ve been very open about struggling emotionally and with my depression around what’s going on. And its come to the point where my depression is so bad that it is going to affect how I complete, not only the school year but my undergrad. And it hurts thinking about that. I know that other people […]
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My uncle would have turned 42 years today. But he’s dead and wasn’t able to experience it [not that there is anything he is missing] I’m going to be honest, its been a rough day for me. Its almost 10 months since he died and it still hurts. I still miss him. And till you […]
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Lately I have been struggling. And given everything thats been going on, its understandable. I am not complaining, but I am still struggling emotionally. I am trying to play my part to flatten the curve, but I also have depression and its not exactly getting better. Everything that I was looking forward to this year, […]
Read MoreWith everything going on, I have been bummed out the past few days and I have a feeling that I am slowly becoming depressed. You might think I am overreacting, but I know myself. I know the signs to look for in depression. Last week started good and then it ended up on a shitty […]
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I’ve had a bit of a shitty day and I want to talk about it. So if you don’t want to read a ramble don’t. I been taking sertraline/Zoloft for my anxiety for about a year now. March will officially mark the one year anniversary. I usually get a refill about every 3 months. I […]
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Arristella 