After a lot of thinking, I decided that I wanted to attend to grad school next year.
I know it might seem like a weird decision because I have been trying to get a job since graduating. But getting a masters degree has always been a part of my plan and I believe that it will beneficial to my future career.
Before graduating, I knew that I wanted to take some time off between finishing my bachelors and applying for a masters because I was burnt out and wanted to focus on my mental health. I wanted to use that time to get a job, build a savings account to move somewhere different for that grad school experience (out of the Greater Toronto Area (GTA) ) and to get a dog in Canada.
Unfortunately, none of that happened and can happen. I can’t move away because I do not have the savings, my mental health is questionable most times and I have had to put off getting a dog until further notice
Even if my original plan is no longer doable, I can still apply to grad school. I just have limited options now. Instead of moving away, I will still be living with my mom and commuting which is why I am only looking at programs in the GTA. I am also limited to the number of applications I can send out because it can get pricey.
With all of that said, just because I am applying, does not mean I end up attending. If there is a small chance that I land an amazing job between now and fall 2021, like a rotational program or a once in a lifetime opportunity, I would put grad school on hold or even do it part-time.
Being the planner and over thinker that I am, I am worried. What if I do not get accepted? Will I be able to get the letters of recommendation needed? Will be able to afford a masters degree on top of the debt from my understand and how am I going to afford that? Am I being selfish getting another degree? Is that degree going to be useful? Are there going to be job opportunities with it? Is the program going to be diverse or am I going to feel like the odd one out as a woman of colour?
I do not know how the next 6 months are going to go and I am just trying to figure out this journey. I want to trust the process and believe everything will work out and everything will happen for a reason. I am willing to take risks along the way and learn the lessons that life is trying to teach me.
Side note – The reason why I talk about getting a dog so much is because I have always been a dog person and always had one till I moved to Canada. I always said when I graduate I would get a dog that I don’t have to share with the grandparents. So not knowing when I can get one and having to put it on hold is hard. Dogs/pets are really good emotional support and best friends.
This is Chocolate. He is my baby. It is almost 11 months since I have seen, which is the longest time. Don’t worry, he does not forget people, and I am his favourite.