Have you ever wanted something so much, that you are scared to think about it?

Have you ever wanted something so much, that you are scared to think about it?

That’s how I feel right now.

Tomorrow afternoon, I have an interview for a position that I applied for. And even though its only for 2 months, I really want to get it. But I am scared of wanting it. I’m scared of hoping only to find out I don’t get.

There’s no formula for you get a position. If they don’t like you, they don’t like you. You can have the education and experience, but its not your decision. Its only up to the people hiring.

Last night I dreamt that I woke up late, forgot about the interview, and I didn’t have zoom downloaded yet. It felt so real. And ever since I woke up, thats what has been on my mind. And thats why I made sure that zoom was downloaded today.

I guess I didn’t want to talk about it with anyone because it would make it more real. My mom only knows because I slipped up. And I am okay with not getting the position. Like I’ve said before, I believe that the universe is looking out for me.

I think the reason why I am more worried and scared is because last year around this time, I interviewed for a position and was offered it, only for them to say a few days later that they made a mistake. I talked about it here, if you want to read. Obviously, I dodged a bullet, but I don’t want that to happen again.