Trying to do Finals with Depression

I’ve been very open about struggling emotionally and with my depression around what’s going on. And its come to the point where my depression is so bad that it is going to affect how I complete, not only the school year but my undergrad. And it hurts thinking about that.

I know that other people are going through much worse situations than I am and it may seem like I am complaining. But its my education and its always been important to me, and unless you care about school you can’t really relate.

Its April. And its finals season. Canadian schools normally have their winter exams in April. You’d think that with all thats going on we wouldn’t have exams, but sorry to break it to you, I have either open book exams or take home exams which is all happening within a week . And they are all worth 60% of my final grade This was supposed to be my last term.

I’ve spent the past few weeks living in pyjamas in bed catching up on tv shows. I do not have the energy or motivation to do anything. I sleep my days away.

How the fuck am I going to write my finals and finish my courses?

Its so overwhelming to think about it when I am not in the right mindspace.

I can’t even explain how bad my depression has been and is getting.

I have a group assignment due tomorrow, and I am going to be honest with you, I did absolutely nothing. And I am going to tell my group members that I don’t want to take credit for anything since I didn’t put effort into it.

I could speak to my professors and hope that they would be understanding. But I don’t to be putting my finals off and have to deal with that months later when I have forgotten everything.

But I don’t want my grade to suffer because I am so depressed.

I rather sleep and stare at the ceiling than look over my powerpoint.

I rather play games on my phone than do practice questions.

We all talk about our physical health, trying to flatten the curve, social distancing. But what about our emotional health. Its just as important.