Am I the only one who feels like August went by quickly? Jeez.
In a few days I am about to start my 4th year of university and I am NOT ready. I still feel like I am on vacation mode. Though I am kind of looking forward to summer ending. Fall is my favourite.
Here are a few highlights of the month.
- Mental Health
This month was hard on my mental health and if you were following me, you would have read about the anxiety I was going through with different things. On top of that I was still depressed, still grieving and still crying. It is not something that I can control, I have accepted that, so I am not going to be hard on myself for that. I will admit that it is exhausting to deal with it back to back. Hopefully I start feeling better soon because I have a psychiatrist appointment in a few weeks, which I am looking forward to. Fingers crossed I get back to normal soon.
- Back to Canada
I am no longer at my grandparents’ place. Its actually hard to say that. If you were following me, you would know that I went back to Canada on the 25th. It is a bittersweet feeling, I am no longer with the doggie anymore or crazy family. I went from a fast-paced household with crazy people, to now being alone and quiet all the time with nothing to do. And even though I am used to living here, its been hard adjusting because it feels like I was gone for so long. Well I guess 3 months is a long time to be away.
This month I had two dental appointments; my regular cleaning and a filling. Everything went okay, thank god and I will see her the next time I see her. Obviously, it was fun to catch up with her because she’s known me for so long. And I was brave enough with my filling, even though I had terrible anxiety the night before.
I finally got my license this month. Like the actual printed license. Its been a very long (and expensive) process. And even though I am happy to have it, I will NOT be driving anytime soon.
So its a St.Lucian license and I live in Canada. I may not be able to use it in Canada, but I can in St.Lucia. However I don’t live there full time anymore and even when I am back there I am scared to drive.My grandfather only has manual pickup trucks and its big, and I am not used to driving large vehicles.
- Someone hurt my feelings
At the beginning of August, a friend said something to me that ended up being very hurtful. I am not sure whether or not they meant it, but that was the first time someone had said something so mean before. Like it made me cry and affected me for a while. I am used to hearing people say hurtful things to me, but this time it was different because I trusted them. And their words mattered. So I never thought that they could say something that would have hurt me so bad.
Don’t worry. Everything is fine right now. However, I am the type of person who does not forgive people easily, so our friendship is not the same like it used to be. I did write up an entire blog post about what happened, though i am not sure whether or not I should post it.
- Almost robbed
Every time I go out with my uncle, some crazy unexpected shit seems to happen. And I think I need to rethink going out because I can’t deal anymore.
This time I was in his vehicle waiting for him because he stepped out to buy food, and someone tried to steal from his vehicle while I was in it. Your read that right. Some guy tried taking money near the front door pocket and never realized I was sitting behind that sit. Don’t worry, I am safe. I called my uncle and the guy left.
Dorian is a weather system. When I was leaving St. Lucia, I was worried because it was passing through there as a tropical storm. Now it is near the Bahamas as Category 4 hurricane. Thankfully we were saved, but I am hoping that I could say the same for the Bahamas and everyone who is dealing with it now. I know how scary it is to go through those things.
So these are the major things that went on during the month for me.
In case you missed anything, this is what I posted throughout the month:
- A Girl’s Best Friend
- Opening Up with Others
- They Didn’t Want me
- Rejection After Rejection
- The Last Two Weeks
- From Enemies to Besties
- Its Okay to Cry
- Kind Words from a Stranger
- 11th August 2019
- A Scarf in August
- Travel + Anxiety
- Fresh Fruit Juice
- Dentist + Anxiety
- Caribbean Night Time Routine
- Last Day Home
- Saying Goodbye
- Anxiety Attack at the Airport
- Calling Canada Home